Heros

Here I sit in the afternoon with some work to do but I need to get something off my chest. So I blog. Is it weird? Probably.

Charles Barkley once said he didn't want to be nobody's role model. Or he didn't want to be your kid's role model. Enrique Iglesias can be your hero. (Yes, my musical taste runs that far.)

I don't want to be your role model, your hero or anything else. Really. I don't. I can't be. I don't want to be your knight in shining armor. I don't want to swoop in and save the day. I don't want you to think of me as your rescue hero or any other hero.

I am me. Flawed and all. And man am I flawed. I guess people say it in a way that they mean it to sound like they appreciate someone. You change someone's tire and they say "You're my hero."

Screw that. I am not a hero. I am some schmuck who went to college for way too long and learned a few things that I now use to support my family. I use that ridiculously expensive education plus my 38 years on earth plus the lessons I learned from my dad and I do the best I can. Sometimes, quite frankly, the best I can isn't good enough. I am glad I can make you feel better. I am glad I can resolve some problem for you. But how the hell does that help me? It doesnt help me resolve my issues. It doesnt act as some cosmic karma that resolves my issues.

Nope, my fucking issues are still there when I am done solving yours. Getting some piece of crap debt collector to stop harassing you is great. I am glad. But that doesn't make me a hero. It makes me a guy who happens to know the law better than the next guy. It makes me a guy who can write a letter and scare the crap out of people. It makes me a guy who could barely passing legal writing because I don't have a big enough vocabulary but can write a letter to normal people because they don't use twenty five cent words either. (Are they worth like a Susan B Anthony by now?)

So you are welcome for whatever you think I have done for you. I assure you its nothing special. I assure you I don't move mountains, I can't part the Red Sea and I can't even float in a pool of water. I assure you that if I didn't solve it, the next guy (or gal) would solve it, hell, maybe even faster and better.

I am not your hero. I dont want to be. I am just Jon. Thats all I want to be and if that isnt enough, then Im sorry.