I was an underachiever

I think I have told part of this story before. But I think its time for the whole story.

I was 14 when I started high school. I had just moved to San Diego. I was a whopping 2.0 student. That is not a typo. I was a 2.0 student. I did just enough to stay eligible for the speech and debate team. Don't laugh. Speech is the reason I can give a 4 hour closing argument with no notes.

So, there you go. My guidance counselor, who my senior year of high school said "Don't bother applying for college. You are just going to waste your parents money," told my parents I needed to see a psychologist. So, I went.

I spent over an hour talking to this "expert." When I was done, she called my parents in. She had a grand pronouncement..........................I was an underachiever. Holy crap. It took a college degree plus a master's degree plus a PhD to figure that out. I knew I was a freaking underachiever. I was an underachiever starting in 3rd grade. Just ask anyone who knew me back then. I was probably born as an underachiever. My apgar should have been 9, but I decided not to cry when I was stimulated, so I ended up a 7. (You don't know if that story is true or not so just laugh!)

Anyway, then there was a an analysis behind why I was an underachiever. I was 14 and I did not know what I wanted to do when I grew up. Yep, that was the problem. I didn't know if I wanted to be a doctor, lawyer or Indian chief. (Its an expression, its not derogatory.) At this point, I saw something I had never seen before.

My dad stood up. And he related the following:

"When I was growing up, I wanted to be a pharmacist. I always knew I wanted to be a pharmacist. So I graduated from high school and went to the Massachusetts School of Pharmacy. I graduated with my degree and went to work at a pharmacy. I then decided I wanted to get my master's degree in pharmacy. So I went back to the Massachusetts School of Pharmacy and obtained my master's degree. I then realized, I hated being a pharmacist. I went back to school to get my PhD in pharmaceutical chemistry. I liked being a research chemist."

At that point, my mom got up, my dad told me to get up, and we left. We walked out. End of the discussion. I never went back.

I then learned the rest of my dad's story. Or, at least, the parts that are relevant to this. After getting his PhD, my dad went to work for Johnson & Johnson as a research chemist. After a few years doing that, he moved into product development, then international mergers and acquisitions. He worked for the dental company and the orthodontic company.

I was 16 and I asked my dad what a pharmacist/research chemist knew about orthodontics. He said "Nothing. But I don't need to. I hire good people and let them do their jobs."

I was 14 and had no clue what I wanted to do with my life. (Okay, so I wanted to be a professional soccer player, but that wasn't happening at my size!) I was 16 and still had no clue. At 18, I was a computer science major. At 19, I was undecided. At 20, I was a business major with an emphasis in accounting. At 21, I graduated with a degree in economics.

You know what? I still had no idea what I wanted to do when I grew up. I worked for an insurance company. I was going to be an insurance adjuster and work my way up the corporate ladder. At 24, I was going to go to law school and be a corporate risk manager. At 25, I was going to be an insurance defense attorney. At 27, I had no idea what I was going to do. At 30, I opened my own practice representing consumers.

My point: I don't know. I don't ever know what my point is when I start this. But, I think this one may be simple. If you are under 25, you don't have to know what you want to do with your life. And it is alright. You can change your mind. Heck, I am in my late 30s and I am still trying to figure out what I want to do some days. It is okay not to know. You are not an underachiever. You are not a failure. You are, however, human.

We put too much pressure on young people to know what they want to do with their lives. Who cares what they want to do with their lives? They are kids. Lets let them be kids. Lets let them grow up. Lets let them figure out what they want to do with their lives.

Oh, one PS: my dad used to tell that story at high school career days. He stopped being invited after telling it a few times. I think that says more about the people running the career days than my dad.